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[10] Past Identities

As mentioned before, I’ve had many identities throughout all this time, and kept a lot of them separate, to the point of completely abandoning some in order to keep a low profile.
Well I don’t want to do that anymore. They were all me, and I want them all to be me (except some I regret).
It makes me nervous to think about how I’m actually revealing this, but I think I really want to. Here it goes.
Pedrossauro, Pedroh, ZeeSpaceWolfy, ShineKolt, Alliums and Nameless/Cuntboy/Blank are the bigger ones, but let’s go into more detail:

I think the first time I ever put myself out there was through Spore, as I ended up drawn to online communities due to the nature of the game. I think I chose the name Pedrossauro for my nick in the game long before I used it anywhere else. I love how it’s foreshadowing, because it’s literally just a mix between my first name and the second part of dinosaur in Portuguese. Literally destined to be a furry long before I knew the fandom existed, especially considering that the yiff that pulled me years later was scalie stuff.
This also came to be my name in Minecraft, since Minecraft somewhat replaced Spore back then. I even came to know about it in a Spore forum I used to be a part of, which then became a Minecraft forum, but this was later.
I had a blog and I’m not going to say the name because cringe, but I’m sure people can find that on their own if they really want to. God I was so young, literally half of my life ago.

After my Spore stuff, I became Pedroh in some ancient Bionicle forum where I made some stupid comics, trying to copy some of the gods there who actually made decent stuff. It’s so embarrassing, but sometimes I can still see some merit in my humor back then, despite my broken English and poor understanding of things. I kinda miss it, but the pressure of posting became too much and I just disintegrated away from the community.

At some point I eventually got myself involved with the stickman animation community, at a place where we would animate fights with other users and the winner would be decided by voting on which animation was more entertaining. I was Pedroh there too and I actually got really into it, but again the pressure of posting was too much and I vanished. I wish my animation skills survived because I’m horrible at it now.

After that I spent some time on Minecraft again during the dreaded years of everyone having a Minecraft let’s play, myself included. But soon enough I ended up on FurAffinity, still as Pedroh. The name Pedroh is really just my first name with the first letter of my second name attached to the end, which is a nice coincidence. Back then my logic was that it forces an Americanized pronunciation, or at least I hoped so, which had a mystique to it that I liked when compared to my normal name. I still prefer the Americanized version of my name to my normal name. It sounds less normal.
I actually became a furry very passively, observing the fandom without interacting with it, which enabled my entire self-portrayal to change a lot without anyone ever seeing it. So by the time I actually started posting on FurAffinity, it was very different from what I planned originally. At first I was going to be a more cuteness-oriented silly chibi furry, but I chickened out last minute and mixed a human StarGate self-insert I never shared around with my wolf self and it resulted in the sci-fi stuff that my account came to be. Because this is the origin of my main sona, I’ll probably go over this in a lot more detail in several drawings about me and lore bits.

Either way, I eventually came to change my name from Pedroh to ZeeSpaceWolfy as I started posting on DeviantArt too, but kept doing mostly the same thing. Oh the same happened with Steam, as I was Pedroh originally, but changed as well. I also changed my name on youtube to that too, though I can’t remember what it used to be. Probably Pedrossauro, since I posted Spore content.
I don’t remember what made me pick this name, but it stuck with me hard. Space Wolfy is obviously from what I became on FurAffinity. I guess I was fully embracing my SFW furry side, while still hiding my yiffy side absolutely. Only my closest friends knew I loved drawing smut.
The zee in there comes from a certain webcomic that was kinda cool back then, I thought it was cool in my name too, but now I don’t like it anymore so I’m happy to drop that part.

After that I started getting into MLP, which has led me to that pesky image board for anonymity. I was never a full brony, since my only depiction as a pony was to disguise my real identity, I never had a connection with it. Yes, this is the first time when I actually went incognito, creating secret identities, mainly because I still couldn’t allow myself to connect my love for the horny to my normal account, since it was connected to my real name and identity.
I posted a bit, but never really had an account anywhere, the name just comes from what I signed my drawings with. I loved drawing weird stuff and smut, even though it was a safe board. I was very different back then, a lot more fun, a lot more casual, freaked out a lot less about stuff, was more eager to fill people’s requests, etc. I did like to show how weird I could be, though, and I loved getting requests that could show that. One of them resulted in what forced the creation of the tag “horn_vore” on e621, so yeah, that was me (obviously).
When I finally made a lewd account on FurAffinity as a secret alt to my main one, I used ShineKolt too, but mainly posted alien stuff. I got scammed on a “character trade” where I wasn’t dumb enough to actually hand a character that was dear to me and made a new one instead, but stupid enough to delete my comments when the person asked me to. Then they said they couldn’t keep the trade but still posted the char I made on their account and I was so embarrassed at how I fell for it that I deleted my account. It amazes me how much I can be smart and a moron at the same time.
After checking my diaries, though, it seems that I was pretty suspicious since I registered the entire conversation in my diaries, but I still hid our comments as requested. Weird.

After ShineKolt, I went away for a bit for most of 2014 (I suspect that it was because I was falling behind when it came to the show and didn’t want to get spoiled).
Eventually I went to another board, and I remember being sent there by someone because I used to be too slow when drawing and they said I could practice being faster there, but the gap in months is too big, judging from my diaries, so IDK. Either way, that was harsh criticism that stuck to me really hard, and really made me who I am today in more than one way. Because pone wasn’t allowed there, I decided to create a new identity, since I liked erasing my trail by this point.
I had no name at first, but one day I used “alliums” for a filename and people decided to call me that after a while. The filename “alliums” was really just “aliens” spelled weirdly for the fun of it, since I was posting alien porn. But oh well, I actually came to like that name, so I happily adopted it. To think that it could have been Herbert.
I loved being Alliums, and I had a lot of fun there, especially initially, and just like ShineKolt, I never knew how much of a nuisance I was being. I did things I’m not proud of and I can now see why some people hated me. But eventually things went downhill, of course, but what can you do. I used to draw all kinds of stuff, so very similar to what I post here now, but excluding my real sona. I was very secretive back then because I didn’t want them to mix, and I guess that led to me abandoning my main sona almost entirely, though my SFW non-anon accounts were already pretty abandoned by then.

Roughly when I started drifting away from the place where I was Alliums, I found myself a new place. One that I had been looking for. One where I could draw whatever I wanted, anonymously and more. There was a place called the moon, which is gone now, where I had A LOT of fun doing some delicious innocent porn all over the place, and this was supposed to be the 2.0 of that. The moon had problems, namely that you couldn’t correct mistakes once you set the tile, and I wanted a place that allowed for that.
Well I found it, and I never really had a name there, since the place would allow you to have any name you wanted, and to change it whenever. Because of this, I decided that it would be fun if I never set a permanent name. But when I found out that I could literally have a blank space for my name, I stuck to that.
People called me many things, trying to get around my delicious funky name, or lack there of, and it was always fun to see what they came up with. Eventually, I would try out other names, though, and some of them would stick around a bit, with Cuntboy being one of such. Eventually people would call me things like Nameless or Blank, too.

I was not as diverse as Alliums in there, since I was trying to keep my identity partially hidden, and I knew that if I revealed all the fetishes I had, it would out me instantly. I actually did identify someone from the image board there, revealing that my concerns were real, and unfortunately I think that scared them away. Sorry bro, I didn’t mean to scare you away.
I actually spent a long time in this place, and lots of things happened, lots of them being bad things, some good things too.
Oh well, either way, this was really the last identity I showed myself as, since I vanished from the internet after that, but there’s still one more to talk about which was contemporary with the final stages of me being Blank.

In rare instances, also trying to disguise myself, I would go by LovingLizardWhip, as a complete disguise and totally disconnected from my main identities. This name holds nearly no significance, it’s literally a juke, and I would use this identity to approach things I really wanted to, while still being afraid of what I could expect to encounter if I was Alliums. I didn’t even have a sona or avatar for this one, and I used it very scarcely, never ended well.

There are some others, but they’re either irrelevant, pathetic disguises for Alliums, or things I’m too embarrassed about or ashamed of. If any of these names and stories seem relevant to you, feel free to check if there’s anything here or here that might be relevant to you as well. I’m probably going to regret being so open, but for now I’m committing to going all in. Sorry if this seems like irrelevant or pointless information. For the actual person behind all of these identities, as well as who I came to be as of late and how I click nowdays, check here .
Viewed: 390 times
Added: 10 months, 2 weeks ago
10 months, 2 weeks ago
What about "justvisitingg" ?
10 months, 2 weeks ago
This confused me at first, but then I used e621 to see if that's an artist name. It seems to be, but as explained in here , I have to say I don't know who that is. Also I don't wanna sound rude, but as I said here , try not to mention artist names around me. It can reveal things to me that I'd rather not know and help people figure out who I know and who I don't know. No stress, though.
Normally I shouldn't even check, but since I blacklisted everything that isn't tagged as me on e621, it's fine.

So short answer: that wasn't me, if that's what you're asking. All my big identities are named here, the other ones never had a name anywhere, pretty much, just me pretending not to be me on the image board.
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