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Norithics

Holy shit, what a tsunami of stupid.

Okay, I'm still unemployed after months, and I joined an employment agency in the hopes of getting some work. The first two companies were total retards, but they said that they found me some temp work getting signatures/signing up people to vote/whatever with this random advocacy group of some sort. It's for the month of June only, but it pays decent, and they reward getting over your quota. "Hey," I think! "I can do that! Way better than no work at all!" So I rode out this morning in my Monday best, shaking hands and taking names.

And then I sit down. They explain that it's actually a petition that they want signatures for. Oh, okay. No big deal, I guess. Probably some zoning ordinance, at worst maybe a little deregulation request. I can hold my nose and do this, right?

And then I asked what it was for.

They used the most flowery corporate zombie wording they could to overexplain the purpose of it, but unfortunately for them, I'm politically savvy and spoke the language. Within minutes, I realize that they are asking me to gather signatures so that the State of Arizona doesn't have to honor any Federal laws that would protect the rights of gays. I stand up, shove the clipboard back at this man and say, "I morally refuse to help you marginalize me."

Another guy, hispanic, looks at me and asks, as any normal person would, "I didn't understand, what does all that stuff mean?" I quickly explain it to him, as the very white guy giving this temp job and his very perky white assistant look very, very worried. His eyes grow wide, he looks at the fear in their eyes and says, "Man, fuck this place!"

We left the building together like action movie buddy cops.

[edit] Reblogged on tumblr.
Viewed: 514 times
Added: 11 years, 10 months ago
 
phyrexfirestorm
11 years, 10 months ago
DAMN THE MAN!!!
Ketsa
11 years, 10 months ago
Good for you~ I remember encountering many a petition gatherer all over the ASU campus and wondering if they were truly in favor of whatever they were gathering signatures for, let alone if they knew what it was at all.
SenGrisane
11 years, 10 months ago
Wow. They got the wrong person there.
MeanFilene
11 years, 10 months ago
I wonder if your post'll go viral on Tumblr? Hm..
Norithics
11 years, 10 months ago
Only like four people follow me on tumblr, I doubt it. :P
ElfenSciuridae
11 years, 10 months ago
You know the song Alice's Restaurant ?

Well, somewhere in the the ending goes like:
" And the only reason I'm
singing you this song now is cause you may know somebody in a similar
situation, or you may be in a similar situation, and if your in a
situation like that there's only one thing you can do and that's walk into
the shrink wherever you are ,just walk in say "Shrink, You can get
anything you want, at Alice's restaurant.".  And walk out.  You know, if
one person, just one person does it they may think he's really sick and
they won't take him.  And if two people, two people do it, in harmony,
they may think they're both faggots and they won't take either of them.
And three people do it, three, can you imagine, three people walking in
singin a bar of Alice's Restaurant and walking out. They may think it's an
organization.  And can you, can you imagine fifty people a day,I said
fifty people a day walking in singin a bar of Alice's Restaurant and
walking out.  And friends they may thinks it's a movement.

Well... its time for a movement.
Norithics
11 years, 10 months ago
Come right in, it's around the back
Just a half a mile from the railroad track~
Arkanos
11 years, 10 months ago
That dude in there with you is awesome. You are too.
Kupok
11 years, 10 months ago
Needed sunglasses and explosions in the background.
Norithics
11 years, 10 months ago
I certainly wish that place would explode. c_c
DOtter
11 years, 10 months ago
I second this!
Incaros
11 years, 10 months ago
.
" Kupok wrote:
Needed sunglasses and explosions in the background.
I second this.
SuperRobot
11 years, 10 months ago
I concur.
That1Hedgey
11 years, 10 months ago
" Kupok wrote:
Needed sunglasses and explosions in the background.



4th.......Wait is this movie directed by Michael Bay?
Kupok
11 years, 10 months ago
Biography of a Norithics.
Directed by Michael Bay.
m2pt5
11 years, 10 months ago
That is absolutely fucking ridiculous. Aren't federal laws supposed to override state laws when there's a conflict anyway, or is it the other way around?

Also you should let the temp agency know that they're misrepresenting the job, and exactly what the job is.
Norithics
11 years, 10 months ago
Oh, I did. I phoned them immediately. They didn't even know what it was all about; my particular agent was horrified and apologized to me profusely. Which would've felt better if she wasn't just another victim in their assholery.
Rikmach
11 years, 10 months ago
Well, yes, the Civil War pretty firmly established the Federal Rule of Law having primacy over State's Rights in probably the bloodiest manner possible.

...All complete assholery aside, am I the only one faintly amused by the fact they're attempting to overturn one of the end results of the Civil War with a *petition*?
Incaros
11 years, 10 months ago
Good for you man. You would think the fact that they have to use decit to try and get these things passed would tell them that most people aren't against homosexuals anymore. Its a shame you couldn't legally punch those guys out. That would have made an AWESOME movie worthy moment. Then again, I just like the idea of A holes being punched. <3
threyon
11 years, 10 months ago
Dissing bigots, LIKE A BAWSS.
BlueonBlack
11 years, 10 months ago
Norithics
11 years, 10 months ago
Most excellent of you. : )
BlueonBlack
11 years, 10 months ago
what can I say?  I have tried to live my life by one simple rule, laid out by Encino stoners, and preached by George Carlin from the future...

"Be Excellent to each other... and Rock on!"
Aravae
11 years, 10 months ago
Daneasaur
11 years, 10 months ago
If Mass effect 3 had an ending THAT badass, I would not be upset XD.
Dwarfstarwolf
11 years, 10 months ago
i've had experiance with those programs and they are no help. alternative? reserch a job that dose on the sight training, and gives good pay bud.
Norithics
11 years, 10 months ago
I've harassed every company that has a warm body working for it.
Dwarfstarwolf
11 years, 10 months ago
thats terrible lol. but in all seriousness, those places don't really help at all i know cause i gave them a year to help and they did nothing. I'm usually more then fair
Chaytel
11 years, 10 months ago
You are not representative of the collective humanity, however. Just because an institution does not work for you does not mean it will not work for others.

This would be like going to a vending machine and it eating your dollar, then you conclude that it is broken; or worse, concluding that all of them everywhere in the world are broken.
Oogzie
11 years, 10 months ago
Gaaay buddy cops.

It's a real annoyance, how often places are hiding true meaning behind excessively obtuse and dry language.
lipucd
11 years, 10 months ago
Holy fucking...I heard Arizona was going down since I left Tempe after I graduated from UAT. But this...This is downright stupid...First you guys end up with a MASSIVE cockroach infestation over the state ( Oh hey, inmates in tents WASN'T a good idea after all! ), THEN I heard there's been a increse in crime overall, and now the fact that the State's trying to underhand your civil rights so they can have a conformed order when there are a SHIT ton of other issues they SHOULD be worrying about...


...It's not like Chicago's much better, but at least the people there can at times look at me in the fact and admit to deny me service or a job based off of where I live and skin color. That might just be though because we both know the law isn't going to be protecting my ass anytime soon.
dmfalk
11 years, 10 months ago
Oy, vey... Not good... Not good at all... :P

You did the right thing, Nori.

Here in California, there's a drive to push for the passage of the California DISCLOSE Act, which is meant to keep backers of propositions and legislation from trying to prevent disclosure of who is backing what- A direct consequence of the backers of the anti-gay Proposition 8 trying to go to court to prevent revealing who was behind that proposition.

As I see it, there is no room for such bigotry, not in today's world. Oh, they try- And your state, sadly, is notable for it! But you're one of the good Arizonans.

I repeat: You did the right thing.

d.m.f.
EricAdler
11 years, 10 months ago
" dmfalk wrote:
Here in California, there's a drive to push for the passage of the California DISCLOSE Act, which is meant to keep backers of propositions and legislation from trying to prevent disclosure of who is backing what- A direct consequence of the backers of the anti-gay Proposition 8 trying to go to court to prevent revealing who was behind that proposition.


Finally, it's nice to see some SANE legislation come out of California.  Oh wait, this is being pushed by the People, not the politicians; THAT explains this bout of sanity.  (California legislators are very quick to pass bills banning the silliest things, like banning plastic bags, and adding a 10-cent per bag tax on paper bags; the cherry on this particular crazy cake?  The state subsidized the building of recycling plants specifically focused on recycling plastic bags.  That's right, they paid for recycling plants with taxpayer dollars, and then panned the very thing the plants were looking for as a resource.)
dmfalk
11 years, 10 months ago
Minor correction: While some state legislators have proposed a statewide ban, it's actually been cities and counties that have enacted such bans and fees as mentioned, (In other words, I'm glad I'm not in San Jose- Eureka doesn't have such a ban.)

d.m.f.
Eviscerator
11 years, 10 months ago
..Hell, I'd have done it anyway just to laugh and watch the courts strike the gestating law down while it is still born.

Then again, the womb IS the best place to defeat evil...I'm so many kinds of asshole that I often lose track.  Sorry to hear your jobsearch continues... *Imagines harmonica music as Nori rides off into the sunset.*
Milkie
11 years, 10 months ago
Well, that's some shit right there.

I've heard of Arizona passing some silly laws like that. I've ehard of a lot of state passing silly things like that, or at least considering it. Sometimes I wonder how people can sit there and think that something like that is good for the state, or even the country. It's... just shocking. Homosexual, heterosexual, black, white, why is it okay to infringe on the rights of some people and not others?

It makes so sense. It's all bigotry and hatred for things that're different. They're afraid, is what they are. Gradually society is turning towards the notion that homosexuality is okay... it's all the old fogies on their way out, leaving the world to such a generation, that have the huge problem with it all.

They ought to get off the pot already. I'm getting tired of hearing about their crap.
RenAndFriends
11 years, 10 months ago
That is an awesome story. Especially the buddy cop bit :)
DarkMatter
11 years, 10 months ago
*claps* good for you ^^. Also lol at the other guy XD.
Eyehazcookie
11 years, 10 months ago
But....that company is a hero trying to prevent the world imploding that would happen if the evil empire of gays got equal rights. There would be a rise of zombies and premarital sex! Everyone run to Arizona to help!

Hope people can tell I'm being satirical here ^_^
Luvythicus
11 years, 10 months ago
Hahaha, fuck yeah, the ending XD
ScottySkunk
11 years, 10 months ago
I salute you Nori. you truly did something awesome.
God damn these people are asshats. They are desperate
to keep their institutionalized bigotry.  Fuck them with a rusty
chainsaw.

I reblogged too.
SkyeEldrich
11 years, 10 months ago
Good for you!  That is truly awesome, and I would have done the same thing.  ^_^
Relee
11 years, 10 months ago
Wow, that's pretty terrible. Good luck finding a job though.
Rakaziel
11 years, 10 months ago
Congratulations! And respect to your agent for apologizing. I had my share of shit with the employment bureau here (in Germany).
At least the political petitions are under a bit closer supervision here.

I wish you good luck with finding your new job, and it is good to hear that you and your agent are on the same side.
CranberryCruise
11 years, 10 months ago
Oh I'm not surprised by that, it's Arizona.

I feel sorry for you Nori, you live in the shittiest state :P
AlexanderValentine
11 years, 10 months ago
Arizona: You're fucked.

(seriously though, you should get some people to protest that shit. That's unconstitutional)
yiharbin
11 years, 10 months ago
wow... :/
DOtter
11 years, 10 months ago
Oh, you live in Arizona? idnkt

I can't say it was all that brave of you to walk out of a job promoting discrimination against yourself... that was more like common sense... but it was still more brave than the neocons behind the damned plan trying to baffle you with BS. Props to the agency for at least being sorry, maybe you should stick with them. And in case I didn't make it clear, good on you!

Nori, how did you learn to understand bafflegab?
Norithics
11 years, 10 months ago
Could've sworn I replied to this.

I became fluent in Bafflegab when I was forced to feed it to clients who wished for me to (truthfully) point out that the company I worked for was a lying, cheating bunch of hornswagglers.
DOtter
11 years, 10 months ago
And of course you couldn't do that very well and expect to keep your job. Ugh! It's a lousy choice for any employee to have to make. At least you learned the language for later... *hugs* ...yeah, ugh.
biggerstaff
11 years, 10 months ago
You should get a medal.

Seriously, well done standing up like that - most people wouldn't have had the guts.
LoZeed
11 years, 10 months ago
*guitar solo in the background*

You really gave those arizona idiots what for, they honestly don't have the right to do that.
(my dads from arizona soo yeah)
BillySquirrel
11 years, 10 months ago
Thanks for standing up for the rest of us. A lesser man would have just taken the money.
GunslingerDragon
11 years, 10 months ago
One of the few good things about this stupid economy, smart people are ending up where they are "unexpected." Companies/organizations/whatever end up showing their hands where they wouldn't do so if they knew someone would understand what they were up to.

If I'm ever president/governor/king and queen of cheese, I'm going to make a rule that anything to be voted on must be worded such that it is understandable. If the average person can't make sense of it, it doesn't happen until it's been rewritten so people can tell what they're signing/voting for/whatever.
JHelfrich
11 years, 10 months ago
It would be nice to have a TL;DR section of contracts/petitions/etc that are in plain english instead of legalese and confusion.
JHelfrich
11 years, 10 months ago
Unbelieavable, there's a real problem with what that organization is doing if it has to use such underhanded tactics in order to operate.  No wonder they're paying so well.

It scares me to think that someone might take the job over moral concerns, whether or not they understand what it was about. Just because of a financial bind or emergency.  (Though I guess someone could take such a job, take the money and do what they can to sabotage the group from the inside, though I don't think I agree with the ethics of that either.)

Come November here, we'll see if gay marriage is upheld.  (WA state)

I wish you luck on the job search and let me know if there's something I could do to help.
WolfeChan
11 years, 10 months ago
You are my Hero!
LabrnMystic
11 years, 10 months ago
I thought they were busy fighting for hispanics to prove they are citizens and not day workers from over the border. Since when were they lobbying against gays? O_o
Norithics
11 years, 10 months ago
Apparently they're good at multitasking. e_e
rick2tails
11 years, 10 months ago
theres a checklist theyre working through since  the republicans own the state government  these days.. abortion, mexicans, unions , tax cuts and gays..rinse lather repeat. just remember though its all about jobs jobs jobs just dont pay attention to what they actually do in Phoenix.
LabrnMystic
11 years, 10 months ago
Fight the good fight and stand firm in what you believe my friend.
lock444
11 years, 10 months ago
ohhh man thats sucks that they tried to pull that. i hope you bro fisted that one guy on your way out like bad asses XD
Shokuji
11 years, 10 months ago
Wow.. human right's should never be up to a vote. ~_~ Kudos to you for not bending over for 'the man'.
PrawoJazdy
11 years, 10 months ago
I think you two handled that well.
Nightwind292
11 years, 10 months ago
They need reporting to the temp company for misrepresentation.  This is as bad as suddenly telling you after you arrive at the job site that there's toxic chemicals that you'll be handling.  Toxic thoughts, as bad as toxic chem, you heard it here.
humbird0
11 years, 10 months ago
Reminds me how much I don't miss Arizona.
It's not a bad place to visit, but it starts to feel lifeless after about a month.
I was there for 3 years.
I got the impression that state has been at war with itself for a very long time.
And the chief of police was notoriously racist. For all I know he's still there.
Bittan
11 years, 10 months ago
The southern states are weird as hell. Like, the US political climate is pretty weird in and of itself, but the southern states are a force unto their own. You'd expect all human rights issues to be federally mandated by this point with no way to diminish the effectiveness on the state level, but then you get stuff like this.

But then I guess "weird" is how the European political landscape seem to a lot of people in the US.
Norithics
11 years, 10 months ago
I suppose it would be prudent to say that they both have their quirks and that the grass is always greener... but.

Oh my is that a vibrant strain of grass you have over there, from the perspective of my literal, non-metaphorical desert.
slicerness
11 years, 10 months ago
did you both put on shades as you left the building? and did the building happen to explode as you walked away? because that would have been even more awesome. the bastards.
TheOme
11 years, 10 months ago
The only way that could of gone better, is if as you left, the building exploded behind you in slow motion and an eagle landed on your shoulder. Wearing sunglasses.
Rikmach
11 years, 10 months ago
So, did you make a friend?
MajinK
11 years, 10 months ago
....Wow, they...wow. good for you for turning that down. Better luck finding a good job. With enough persistence you'll get one. Hell, look at me. I was unemployed since August of last year, and only last month did I finally get a job. Not saying it'll take you that long(it's more like job hunting in new jersey just sucks), just that if you persist enough you'll find something. Good luck, Nori!
Tlaren
11 years, 10 months ago
Reblogged for great justice!
GeckosFancies
11 years, 10 months ago
I just might have taken the job so I could waltz around avoiding every chance at getting a name signed, then turn the empty list in and ask for my basic pay.
But this made me grin more. :D

Oh man yes, so stupid. It says something that they had to mask it in legalese to even present the idea.
Norithics
11 years, 10 months ago
"Seymour Boybottom? And they signed fifty times??"
GeckosFancies
11 years, 10 months ago
"And this... Peehlo Bayta?"
"I think he was Indian or something."
jimwormmaster
11 years, 10 months ago
Good for you.  I'm against marginalizing anyone, whether I agree with their religion/sexuality/fashion sense/etc....even if they like twilight.  This country was based on few core principles...but all are created equal is definitely one of them!  Would have been funny if like half the employees got the same look and walked as well.

Reminds me of this story I read once.  This guy was mistreating one of his employees.  A customer calls him out on it, and the manager says, "If you don't like the way I treat my employees, you can LEAVE!"  Every single customer dropped their purchases and walked out.  If only there were more to take a stand against discrimination like that.

tl;dr:  Bravo, sir.  You win today's internet.
Stryderfox
11 years, 10 months ago
Congrats Nori... I'm still job searching you know.
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