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PreciousRat

I'm okey now.

Yo.
Some of you may had seen that latest pic on the scraps. It's a scary pic, and I mainly used it to keep myself busy from the alternative.

The picture has a meaning two fold. It's meant to show the possibility of one of my friends actually dying, as well as my own desires for dead after hearing about it. I really wanted to hurt myself. So instead I poured a few hours into the picture to stay busy, even while I was shaking.

After posting it I really just didn't have much to say, I wasn't online for a while and just slept, and worked more. Since then I've recovered a bit, even if there are lingering feelings of suicide. I always have lingering feelings, honestly.


But yeah, I'm a bit more stable now. More porn coming soon, and we'll be back to business as usual.
Viewed: 232 times
Added: 3 weeks, 4 days ago
 
Alfador
3 weeks, 4 days ago
Glad you're okay! *hug*
PreciousRat
3 weeks, 4 days ago
Thanks.
MasterChief2554
3 weeks, 4 days ago
Please don't do something bad to yourself
PreciousRat
3 weeks, 4 days ago
I can only promise to try.
MasterChief2554
3 weeks, 4 days ago
Please do your best
Neos8
3 weeks, 4 days ago
I am so sorry that happened to you. I wish your friend recovers if possible and *HUGS you tightly* I wish you better health and recovery too
PreciousRat
3 weeks, 4 days ago
Don't think there's much recovering if they went through with it. And I'll be alright for now.Thanks.
Neos8
3 weeks, 4 days ago
OH I thought it was something else and i'm deeply sorry that i misread that
PreciousRat
3 weeks, 4 days ago
It's fine. But yeah, they probably died. No worries.
Jessotter
3 weeks, 4 days ago
I hate seeing posts like this... I wish i could do something to help. I'm so sorry about your situation. I've been through a good friend committing suicide. It's not fun for anyone and it's the worst thing to live with thoughts of what could have been done. You have so many that support you and would be torn inside if anything happened. You're not alone, and should reach out if you need it. And i am glad you have a way to vent. Anything to keep your mind off those kinds of thoughts. If it means anything, you have my support if you ever need it ^w^ Hang in there!
PreciousRat
3 weeks, 4 days ago
Yeah. Just happens sometimes. Living is difficult when yar dealt poor cards.
Jessotter
3 weeks, 4 days ago
Sadly those poor cards are dealt to most people. I've thought about depression like this a lot and i find that giving yourself some goals makes life a bit less sad at times. Even if it's smaller things like learning a new language or something, giving yourself a little bit of a drive forward helps keep your mind from wandering off into those suicidal thoughts. And of course keeping in contact with people in any way. Even if you think it doesn't help to talk with anyone, i think there really are some healthy benefits from just chilling and talking about anything.
PreciousRat
3 weeks, 4 days ago
Sometimes even having goals isn't good enough. We all have things we wanna do. Things that are important to us. Sometimes the suffering ain't worth the effort.
CodyFox
3 weeks, 4 days ago
I understand the struggle *hug* i'm glad you're here, and always happy to see you in streams.
PreciousRat
3 weeks, 4 days ago
Yeah. Thanks.
chocochu
3 weeks, 4 days ago
I understand...chu...some i've died that were close to me...I completely understand the feeling just be more careful chu~ >w< *offers a hug*
PreciousRat
3 weeks, 4 days ago
Yeah. It happens.
chocochu
3 weeks, 4 days ago
*nods* mhmm...it does...stuff happens ya can't do much about it...~ ;w;
Ravi
3 weeks, 4 days ago
Stuff like that is always tough to deal with. I'm glad to hear you're doing a bit better. I just wish I could help you feel a bit better. I'm always around if you wanna talk about anything. Hang in there best Rat friend :)
PreciousRat
3 weeks, 4 days ago
Thankies.
lucashoal
3 weeks, 4 days ago
Brains are a fuck. Ima hug your face.
PreciousRat
3 weeks, 4 days ago
Surely.
lucashoal
3 weeks, 4 days ago
*tiny friend fox hugs* <3
e - and don't call me Shirley.
Nevon
3 weeks, 4 days ago
It was quite the frightening image.  I hope you can keep strong through the rough times.  
PreciousRat
3 weeks, 4 days ago
I'll do what I can. Was meant to be scary, so I guess I drew it well.
Nevon
3 weeks, 4 days ago
Indeed!  It was very emotion inducing.  Situation aside it was a very powerful piece

And all I can ask is you do what you can.  Life is too varied to ask any more than that.  
Milen
3 weeks, 4 days ago
Hang in there man.
Num8
3 weeks, 3 days ago
Glad you're feeling better ! If you ever need to talk or chat feel free to poke me, i'm a good listener. :3
Rhemora
3 weeks, 3 days ago
Good to hear your improving, I am happy to hear it was just a vent picture.
RabbitGTI
3 weeks, 2 days ago
I'm glad to hear that you're feeling better, I know how you feel, when my dad first died, I had a little survivor's guilt and I thought about drinking my pain away thinking it would help, but a friend of mine told me to stay away from drugs and alcohol because they don't make things go away, you have to actually deal with your issues. It's always great to have outlets, mine's lifting weights and reading. I honestly never saw the picture, but I'm happy you're getting better all the same.
BrokenPaw
1 week, 1 day ago
I'm very happy to see you are doing better, and I hope you have a blessed day today as well.
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