Happy birthday
Happy birthday to me
Happy birthday
Happy birthday to me

Well, it's time to celebrate my birthday, it happens every year
We'll eat a lot of broccoli and drink a lot of beer
I should be good and happy that there's something I can eat
A million people every day are starving in the street

My daddy's in the gutter with the wretched and the poor
Myr mama's in the kitchen with a can of Cycle Four
There's garbage in the water
There's poison in the sky
I guess it won't be long before we're all gonna die

Happy birthday
Happy birthday to me
Happy birthday
Happy birthday to me

Well, what's the matter little friend, you think this party is the pits
Enjoy it while you can, we'll soon be blown to bits
The monkeys in the pentagon are gonna cook our goose
Their finger's on the button, all they need it an excuse

It doesn't take a military genius to see
We'll all be crispy critters after World War III
There's nowhere you can run to, nowhere you can hide
When they drop the big one, we all get fried

(Come on boys and girls, sing along, ok?)

Happy birthday
Happy birthday to me
Happy birthday
Happy birthday to me
wow! (background screaming, sound effect)

Well there's a punk in the alley and he's looking for a fight
There's an Arab on the corner buying everything in sight
There's a mother in the ghetto with another mouth to feed
Seems that everywhere you look today there's misery and greed

I guess you know the Earth is gonna crash into the sun
But that's no reason why we shouldn't have a little fun
So if you think it's scary, if it's more than you can take
Just blow out the candles and have a piece of cake

Happy birthday
Happy birthday to me
Happy birthday to me
wow!

Happy birthday
Happy birthday to me
Happy birthday
Happy birthday to me

(Happy Birthday!)

And a pinch to grow an inch!