I've noticed this thing that's very consistent lately. No matter what, I get totally worn out if I'm talking to or around people for too long. Doesn't matter how enjoyable the company is, I get completely brain dead after about 5 or 6 hours tops. It's almost like that feeling right before going to bed, except there's a tenseness about it. I experienced this once right after a hanging up a call, then looked up to see 3 people trying to get ahold of me and another trying to call me x__x I HAD to kill skype in that moment. HAD TO. Like, a very basic part of me that wanted to survive made me do it lol.
Once all forms of communication with the outside world were gone, I turned off the lights, put on some quiet music and after some time I noticed that tense feeling melting away, my head cleared, and I could think more clearly. A friend of mine describes being alone as a horrible, boring experience. He gets bored easily, falls asleep fairly easily, and can listen to about 5 different things at one time. I'm the exact opposite lol. I find things to do all the time no matter what, whether it's thinking on a problem, an art idea, or just observing things. At my computer...XD...I'm all over the place. I usually have to take pills to sleep or have some regular noise going on in the background. If someone's talking to me I can't sleep at all no matter what. As for the listening, it's one thing at a time pleez.
I'm starting to think my problem with streaming isn't really people per se, but the stimulation that comes from it. No, I don't mean anything yiffy, git yer mind outta that gutter! :P I mean, a chat box with people chatting, music playing, and focusing on my art. I think I usually burn out around 4-5 hours, but if I stay focused more on my art, I can go on a lot longer.
One thing I'm really really starting to dislike is people wanting to talk to me for the sole reason of "you should talk to me more". That's not their words but my interpretation of their want. XD I've heard that extroverts thrive a lot on the anticipation of positive interaction with people. If you don't talk to people "enough", that's something negative right off the bat lol. So it's kind of a self-sustaining cycle. I isolate to recharge my brain, not to diss people. Although, the dissing part is kind of an unwanted side effect. ^///^
Hmm...so uh, yeah, positive interaction. It's a myth, but I believe it exists ^.^
I'd love to be right smack in the middle of the introvert / extrovert spectrum honestly. I'll aim for that :P Don't wanna diss my homies yo.
6 years, 9 months ago
28 Feb 2012 11:29 CET