No, I am not about to tell you the school I wish I had gone to. I'm quite happy with the schools I want to.
What I actually mean is a literal dream-school.
Last night, I had a very interesting dream. WHy that dream is interesting, I'll get to in a (probably long and wordy) bit.
Quite a while ago, I learned about some lucid dreaming techniques. I thought it was interesting in passing, didn't really intend to do lucid dreaming, but still played with the techniques anyway. I've had a few lucid dreams, but mostly now I'm just stuck with periodic episodes of sleep-paralysis.
Yay.
You don't necessarily need to be a lucid dreamer to have a reccuring dream or, in some cases, a recurring place in your dreams.
In my case, I happen to have a recurring school that I tend to visit in my dreams.
I can specifically recall five dreams that involve this school. I don't know what order they actually took place in, and it doesn't really matter, except for the last one.
Here they are and a brief explanation of them, and you might notice a pattern.
Dream #1
In this dream, I am waiting for the bus to take me home. It's oddly dark, and the school's waiting area is somewhat gothic-looking, almost like a castle.
When I get on the bus, it goes to like a "top-down" view like a driving game, and the bus is being all crazy driving toward my home.
Dream #2
I am going to my dorm room for the first time. I leave a building that is sort of an island-building in the middle of the campus, and head to my dorm.
My dorm is fairly elaborate and ornate. The common area is wood-flooring, there are lots of windows. There's a sectional with ottomans and a TV. There's a wooden staircase with an ornate railing on one side that leads up to a loft area that is my bedroom.
Dream #3
It's lunchtime, and I arrive early. I get my lunch, which is something like ham and mashed potatos, and sit down with some friends. I eat my lunch, but then I go to get some more, trying to get through the line a second time, but they don't let me through :(
Then, I remember I'm supposed to participate in a play on the stage, so I go backstage and get ready. During this play, I realize that I haven't practiced my lines, or that I've forgotten them, so I'm a bit delinquent; goofing around not really helping the production at all.
Dream #4
I go to an English class. We're having a test. However, I have not done any of the homework all year, and I have not studied for the test. Even though I feel like I should know the material anyway, I can't remember anything.
Dream #5
I'm heading to various classes in this dream.
First I had to a reading class that's a little odd. The classroom is full of lounge chairs, and it's a room that's basically a glass box; windows all around.
The second class I go to is a science class. Or something like it. In this class we're using something like VR or some other such gismos; to be honest I don't remember much about the contents of the classes.
The third class was an art class, which for some reason involved me washing my hands in a sink with dirty water that got my hands discolored, and I had to dry them off with a towel to get the discoloration off.
I may have actually had another class where I took a test, but that kind of blurs with the science class.
However, one detail on this dream that was significant, is that between classes, I was having trouble remembering where my classrooms were. Even though I had been doing the same routine for days, I just couldn't recall where exactly the room was that I was supposed to go to. I just sort of happened upon the room eventually.
-----
As you might have picked up on, at least 3 of the dreams have to do with some kind of lack of preparation and/or memory loss.
But, there's one interesting thing about Dream #5, the thing that spurred me to write this journal.
As I said, I've had a few lucid dreams. And in those dreams, I have done a couple of nifty things (I've had a double-inception dream before). But this one... Takes the cake.
While I was waiting outside the artroom class, as this school is something of a mesh between high school (on a bell-schedule) and college (where you just kinda wait outside class until it's time), I thought something like this to myself:
"I bet that not being able to remember where the classrooms are is symbolic of being anxious about forgetting parts of me that made me who I am."
In other words... I was psychoanalyzing my dream... While I was within my dream... While it was happening.
To better put it while I'm awake, my within-dream psychoanalysis was wondering if the rooms represented parts of me or significant memories that I have that helped to shape me and my identity, and that not remembering where those rooms were was a kind of anxiety about forgetting these significant things over time.
It was a very odd feeling waking up having remembered this, and I've been pondering it all day. Strange enough that I was able to recall these other dreams and feel that they were connected by the setting.
I can talk about more dreams I've had if people are interested. Some of them are funny, some of them are weird, a few of them are downright horrifying.
One dream I've had will end up being a story one day. I've written a bit of it, been thinking I'll finish it this year but we'll see xD
Anyway, just a peek into the mind of a polar function, I guess. Hope it was fun.
-- Somnombulemniscate
