I read a lot of self help books. I mean A LOT. They're not as lame as everyone thinks. They're actually quite helpful. Whether it's a book about art or a book about coming to terms with your emotions, it's helpful. First step is to admit you're not this perfect specimen of a human being. This step is pretty easy. I mean, look in the mirror and you'll find a shit ton of faults. We are our worst enemies.
I've noticed a lot of people have a raging boner for hating themselves. I use to be one of them. It took me years of trial and error to change my thinking. Back then, I didn't realize nor utilize any self help books. Now that I'm listening/reading all these books, a lot of "ah-ha" moments are popping up and I want to share them with all of you. Hopefully they'll help you as much as they've helped me :)
One of the recent books had an interesting idea in it. It went over how we all paint a picture of ourselves for the world to see. We'll use me as an example. I loved to party. I still love to party. I can't do it much anymore because I work constantly (which is a good thing) but if I had all the money in the world, I'd probably die of alcohol poisoning. Now STOP. What image do you have in your head? How do I look? What am I doing? The image I have of myself is a drunk. Yeah, a fun loving, happy go lucky drunk but a drunk all the same. You can powder a donut, it's still a donut, ya know? I painted this image of myself and people ate it up. I'd be out partying four or five nights a week. The weeks I tried to stay home, I'd get a call from someone asking to come out and party. After awhile, the booze started to take it's toll and I decided that I didn't want to live like that anymore. I hated feeling like shit. I hated hiding behind a bottle because I couldn't face myself. I needed a change. I needed a new canvas.
I like to drink. I tried to quit, multiple times. I didn't want to quit so it ended in failure. Instead, I came to terms with it. I like to drink and that's ok...as long as I don't abuse it. There's a fine line you walk when you're an "alcoholic". You feel as if you need it but at the same time you hate yourself for doing it. That's the ideology when you're in deep. It's a shitty, vicious circle. Once I came to terms with it, I didn't feel the need to do it so much. I like to think it was weight of the lie being lifted. After I came to terms, I didn't need to hide in a bottle. I still drink but no where near what I use to. All because I changed how I saw myself. I changed the image I painted for others to see.
If you want to be loved, start with yourself. I'm not talking about looking in the mirror and chanting some mantra. I'm talking about thinking about your flaws and finding out what you can do about them. I have crooked teeth and I don't like it. Is this my fault? Not really but it's my responsibility. This happened and even though it's not my fault, I have to deal with it. Do I want to deal with it in a way that it would blame others for my issue? Do I want to point out other people's flaws in hopes that my own won't be seen? Or do I want to accept that my teeth are crooked, there is nothing I can do about it (other than extensive dental work), and smile as big as I can so I point out to the world, "YES, this is my flaw! It sucks but I'm ok with it!" I mean, shit....if I'm hanging around people that are shallow enough to point out such obvious flaws, I really need to rethink my circle of influence. OH, the circle of influence is that three foot radius around you. All you need to do is make sure that three foot circle is filled with positive vibes and life gets a ton easier.
I think I've rambled enough for now. A quick recap. Stop and ask yourself, "how am I painting myself for the world to see?" You need to love yourself before you can love another. Stay positive, my friends.
Good vibes and much luv ~~<3
| Viewed: |
14 times |
| Added: |
7 years, 2 months ago
18 Feb 2017 07:04 CET
|
|
|
