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KichigaiKitsune

Watch out, you might catch Gay!

Geez, another "typical gay rights" journal from me. What the hell?

As I always stress to people, I don't technically consider myself gay. I've got nothing against women. If you don't know what the Kinsey Scale is, feel free to look it up on Wikipedia.

But what I want to talk about is just one form of an issue with how western society approaches sexuality that really needs to be addressed.

"You're gay? ... Um, d-does that mean you're attracted to me? Because the sheer possibility makes me uncomfortable!"

Naturally, this has been discussed elsewhere. It's very powerful and pervasive: I can state with absolute honesty that when I was growing up, my friends were more comfortable with every bloody other thing I was sexually attracted to aside from the possibility that I might like guys.

Everything else they were fine with. If I said my favorite porno was "Two Girls, One Cup"* I probably would've gotten nothing like the reaction if I admitted there was a possibility there was a boy in my class or amongst my friends that I wanted to see for a protracted "group shower." Hell, the entire environment, fearing ostracism and exclusion from your friends due to your inborn sexual interests, leads to a rather extreme form of self-repression.

Scary to think how many people deny their interests until the day they die. Whatever they are.

It's incredible to hear tales of preteens and high-schoolers coming out to their peers without suffering abuse for it. Things have changed so much and I hate to admit that my generation is part of the Old Homophobic Guard. I can say with pride though that most of my friends have now done away with their old attitudes.

Now, the answer to the question asked above is very simple:

"It's very unlikely that a gay guy will even look at you unless he believes for some reason you might be interested. If he does, that does not mean it will color his attitude towards you, that he will have less respect for you, or that it will be a significant factor at all in how you interact. It definitely doesn't mean he's going to try to rape or seduce you. You aren't gay, he is, he is going to respect that if you do the same. Do you think women walk around in perpetual fear or perturbation that every man they see wants to have sex with them?"

These truths are almost self-evident, but the problem is, that isn't the issue.

The issue is they're terrified of the notion that someone could potentially want to have homosexual sex with them. Not scared that it will happen, scared of the notion.

So they're perpetually terrified whenever a gay person of their own gender admits they're gay. "Gasp! Does that mean they want to fuck me? Ewww!! Icky butt-sex! " Dude, maybe. Not that all gay men are interested in anal, but so fucking what? It's a compliment. Unlikely, since they know you don't like dick. It really shouldn't concern you, just the same way that women are aware that many of the men that walk past them might, possibly, perhaps be checking out their ass and imagining plowing them like a springtime wheat-field.

Funny how the ones who are pathologically afraid of and "disgusted" by sex are the ones that can't seem to shake it out of their minds.

Also: "Lawl I'm a bigot and I have a fact for you! Did you know that FAGS go through hundreds of partners before they die?!"

Not only is that a blatant lie and an appeal to the entrenched social fear of sexuality, whaddaya expect 'fags' to do? Get fucking married?



* - Trust me, it isn't. *retch!*
Viewed: 62 times
Added: 6 years, 10 months ago
 
indorri
6 years, 10 months ago
I have to admit, one of my fears when coming out to my friends was that they'd think I was going to pursue them. Wholly illogical on the face of it, but I'm well enough aware of this trope playing out in some straight men's mind that it was a distinct possibility for me.
Manafox
6 years, 10 months ago
This is the exact reason I haven't "come out" to about 90% of my non-furry friends yet. It's also the reason I lied to those 90%, that my last long-term partner was female, not male. Only when someone else has said "I'm bisexual" have I declared myself the same. :x
mouse24
6 years, 10 months ago
That is what religious indoctrination (brainwashing) dose, They use the fear they spread to keep the masses in line. Its a lot easier to suppress a thought that is against public opinion, so they instill fear of higher power to make there job easier. Why work hard to suppress the people when you can use the people to suppress the the people
fullmetal53
6 years, 10 months ago
I too found the all too common heterosexual male fear that every male who has even the most remote attraction to the male figure wants to have sex with them, to be most perplexing. But even deeper than that, I find that attitude to be disgustingly arrogant. They would speak as though they were a modern day Adonis. *Rolls eyes*
mouse24
6 years, 10 months ago
I had not considered that, but its a good point.
RainyKirin
6 years, 10 months ago
I got lucky on this front because I've got some really supportive close friends. The rest of the town (including my normal friends who aren't total biffles) is pretty much stereotypical redneckville.

I still remember an incident in high school English class where the two kids behind me were rattling off (in excruciating detail) all the ways they'd disfigure, maim, and eventually murder their own children if the kids turned out gay. I became so violently ill just listening to it that I had to take the rest of the day off to recover, thankfully the nurse didn't ask me what was wrong.

I mean, people here still believe that statistic about how gay men are more likely to rape children. I really don't know why everything's still so backwards...it's a religious town but still, I know not all Christians are gay bashing fanatics (the churches areound here are pretty mild actually!) I'm guessing it's just people having all their knowledge passed down from the previous generation, plus the atmosphere of male dominance. /shurg
KichigaiKitsune
6 years, 10 months ago
Bloody hell. You know, the only time I heard other kids talking like that was on the 12th of September, 2001.
About Osama bin Laden. I hope the kids you mentioned didn't really, truly believe they'd do that.

There's a lot of misconceptions about homosexuals and they're very prevalent in certain communities. Frankly, I don't believe a lot of gay people are helping their case, specifically the ones that take the time to be as stereotypically "queer" as possible. That behavior is just embarrassing and sure as hell is going to alienate people.
Was going to do a journal about this, since it was on my mind. Squirrelfox got me to do the one about Jimmy Kimmel instead though.

In my case, most of my friends ARE straight and the ones that know don't seem to mind me being a little not-straight. But like you said: the fact is, few if any of my friends are religious. ... So what's with the few of them ARE anti-gay, etc?

Religion started this, yes. But it did such a good job of creating a hostile, anti-gay/lesbian/sexuality atmosphere that it still has a death grip on the minds of those who outright reject the notion of God.
aldreyachan
6 years, 9 months ago
I really don't know why everything's still so backwards...

I think I have an idea-

it's a religious town

There ya go. =D
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