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LupineAssassin

For those who want to know the real story

This is the journal
Wolfblade
Wolfblade
wrote for me in March 2009, before he blocked me. It bears repeating, because some furs still don't understand what really happened to me. In minute detail, this is the real story before I enlisted in the U.S. Army. I will remove this post if there's any static.

Hello. Thank you for finally letting me speak my case. I had a friend help me prepare this letter to you, to check for accuracy and help me say what I need for you to hear because obviously, I did not do well enough defending myself on my own so far. This is the truth of my situation, and not the twisted version you heard and banned me over.

I resigned from my job Friday June 6, 2008, and got an amount of severance pay, which I have tried to not draw from as much as possible.

Kits5786 paid for my plane ticket to move in with Anailaigh and Aurcowolf in Arizona. I have since paid Kits5786 back IN FULL and do not owe him any money. Anailaigh's PayPal was used during this time because I did not have an account. She bought me a ticket for much less than what was raised and then she pocketed the difference, as well as keeping other donations that were made to help me during that time before I got my own PayPal account.

I was with them for three weeks, maybe a little more, during which time I paid them $500, not counting the donations she pocketed from people trying to help me. ANY talk of me leeching off people I was living with has come only from Anailaigh and Aurcowolf, even though Anailaigh had pocketed donations she'd collected in my name and lied to me about the cost of the plane ticket. They were both jobless at the time, and apparently had expected me to pay their bills with my severance money. When I only paid my fair share of $500, that was when they started accusing me of not paying bills. Because I wasn't paying ALL of THEIR bills.

When I left them, I was with my father for only a few days, and then living with my mother since mid-August. I was helping my mother with half her rent while I was there, as well as food and other needs. When my money ran out, she had no more patience and turned me out. As far as my relationship with my parents is concerned, THAT is something personal and private, and NOT involving this community at all, so I do not believe using that against me in this ban is appropriate.

I then lived in a hotel until my credit cards ran out, and am now in a homeless shelter.

I have been looking for work all this time. I am not the only person who is having trouble finding work due to the economy.

The only point where anyone can accuse me of being a leech is with Anailaigh and Aurcowolf, when Anailaigh pocketed donations SHE gathered in my name and I was lied to about it at the time. They are the only ones who could accuse me of leeching, and they are lying. I paid $500 in the three weeks I was with them, and they were threatening me with eviction the entire time to try and force me to use my severance money to pay off THEIR debt.

According to Yak, you listened to the trolls who flamed me from WTF-FA and lulz.net as evidence of my "reputation." Those people were not involved and do not know anything other than the lies and rumors and hate started by Anailaigh and Aurcowolf. That kind of thing is what those places are BUILT for and I was saddened to hear from Yak that the flames of trolls and haters were the "evidence" of my "reputation."

Yes, I have bought commissions while I have been struggling, because it is horribly depressing being in this situation and without SOMETHING to occasionally cheer me up, I would not be able to keep dealing with things. I know now how that LOOKS to people who are not willing to look beyond just the surface, just like people have accused you of using FA donations on personal commissions just because you get a lot of commissions while also asking people for money for FA. Even though it is obvious that is just lies, rumor, and jealousy. But if those people and their lies are going to get me banned from this community, then from this point I will just have to not allow myself to have what is one of the few bits of happiness I get now and then, and simply deal with my problems.

Even if what you heard about me was true, there are too many people who do even worse than the lies said I did, and unless you're going to ban all of them too, then banning me is unfair and wrong. I hope that with hearing the truth of my situation, you can understand why it was a mistake. I don't blame you so much as the people who gave you false information, and even if you don't make a public apology to undo the damage to my reputation your journal caused, I just hope you will at least let me back onto FA so I can try and defend my reputation myself.
Viewed: 523 times
Added: 7 years, 2 months ago
 
Lyserdigi
7 years, 2 months ago
Why DID Wolfblade block you ?
Oh.. and i'm just curious.. I has no personal "interest" in this..
And I refuse to take sides... All i know is, that there has been some kind of "Drama"..
Mostly between you and FA... And since i don't know any of you personally, nor have i any first hand knowledge of the situation, i simply refuse to take any sides...
LupineAssassin
7 years, 2 months ago
*hugs* I want the truth to be heard, that's all.
Lyserdigi
7 years, 2 months ago
And the truth will set you free =^..^=
LupineAssassin
7 years, 2 months ago
Christ, I fucking hope so! ^^ Thanks.
DOtter
7 years, 2 months ago
*hugs* :(
LupineAssassin
7 years, 2 months ago
*hug*
Jimbear
7 years, 2 months ago
*hugs you tight* Well you know I am one who doesn't believe any of the bullshit they said you did.  If you have to give up purchasing commissions, there are those I am certain would be MORE than glad to offer you occasional free art!

There's me, for instance, who wouldn't mind helping you out.  (That is, when I have time.  Right at this moment, I have so much on my platter that I can't even do personal art for myself.)  Because I love you a lot as a friend.  (You are probably one of the top 10 best friends I've had in my lifetime so far.)

There are other artist friends as well I'm sure would be glad to assist a good person such as yourself.
LupineAssassin
7 years, 2 months ago
*HUGS* ^^
MarcoWolf
7 years, 2 months ago
if my art didnt suck and my scanner was working i would be one such person who would be glad to do art for ya free of charge.......i also believe you and not them. you are a friend to me and i stand beside my friends through thick an thin...........*hugs ya tight*
Jimbear
7 years, 2 months ago
What sucks about your art?  I think your line art is cute.
MarcoWolf
7 years, 2 months ago
Really!? daaaawwwww you made me blush im flattered!
LupineAssassin
7 years, 2 months ago
Aw, thank you. ^^
MarcoWolf
7 years, 2 months ago
anytime! you are my friend!
Tycloud
7 years, 2 months ago
I had no Idea.  Im sorry you have this bad luck.
LupineAssassin
7 years, 2 months ago
*hugs you*
NickLion
7 years, 2 months ago
*HUGS* I can totally empathize with the rotten roommate situation - I was paying about half of a 4-share rent deal because one roommate (who made more than me even after taxes) somehow didn't have enough to pay for rent or food, but was more than willing to buy beer and weed for groups of 20 to bring home at around 2:30 AM on school nights. I'm still paying off the credit card debt from that debacle... But you deserve much better!
LupineAssassin
7 years, 2 months ago
*hugs*
Nick2Shy
7 years, 2 months ago
I'm still quite new, so I knew there was some drama with you guys but still I didn't know anything at all *hugs tight*
LupineAssassin
7 years, 2 months ago
*hug*
Kaheiyattsu
7 years, 2 months ago
Mmmm it makes me sick when people hate just for the sake of hating. Makes me die alittle inside.
LupineAssassin
7 years, 2 months ago
I lost count as to how many times I died over the course of three years....
cursedscythe
7 years, 2 months ago
Too much drama in this world. I hope it gets better for you, you're a good soul.

*hugs*
LupineAssassin
7 years, 2 months ago
Thanks, Zonck. ^^ *hug*
LucasAndDuma
7 years, 2 months ago
I have heard all the rumors but I chose to ignore them I think your a ool person and dont deserve the shit you got -hugs-
LupineAssassin
7 years, 2 months ago
*HUG* ^^
nate3prodigy
7 years, 2 months ago
I was in a wolfblade livestream and when I mentioned you he said to get off the topic.  I wondered why.  But this seems personal and complicated so I wont try to understand.  But anyways *hugs* hope you get better
LupineAssassin
7 years, 2 months ago
*hugs* Thanks. :)
nate3prodigy
7 years, 2 months ago
And I didn't see how wolfblade, or why, he blocked you in this journal.  Well I know wolfblade can go into a bad mood at times. I wish I had paypal to donate but I guess the thought counts.
LupineAssassin
7 years, 2 months ago
I won't discuss the
Wolfblade
Wolfblade
thing here.
nate3prodigy
7 years, 2 months ago
I'll just do what my parents told me to do and keep my nose out of it
Jimbear
7 years, 2 months ago
Yet another proof to the kind person Allan is!

https://inkbunny.net/submissionview.php?id=138921#comme...

Arranging to get a kind artist's art coloured. ^^
LupineAssassin
7 years, 2 months ago
Aw! ^^ I did that? :P HEH!
Jimbear
7 years, 2 months ago
Damn right you did! ^_^ Are are going to.  And THAT is why I wuv you so. ^_^
thevoreman
7 years, 2 months ago
I emphasize for you and will not judge you.
I've been blames for stuff that I did do...and I had to pay the consequences, please don't let this bring yourself down.
The Truth is powerful, but it is as sharp as a razor.
LupineAssassin
7 years, 2 months ago
*hug* ^^
thevoreman
7 years, 1 month ago
*hugs back*
Brexxie
7 years, 2 months ago
wow im glad to see that journal i remember when yoiu called me looking for Rykuno we ended up talking for close to 2 hours
LupineAssassin
7 years, 2 months ago
*hugs*
jeffpossible
7 years, 2 months ago
*HUGS* I feel you. HOW does somebody block you as you try to come clean? Some folks -_-
LupineAssassin
7 years, 2 months ago
*gives you a hug*
MarcoWolf
7 years, 2 months ago
i trust my friends and i stand beside them, no matter what! i take them at there word and trust them not to lie to my i hear the truth in your words and i stand with you as a friend!
LupineAssassin
7 years, 2 months ago
*HUG*
MarcoWolf
7 years, 2 months ago
*hugs back*
Fey
Fey
7 years, 2 months ago
Hey hun!

Well, how to say this now, I don't really 'know' you - that's -you- behind the sweet user pic - but I think I can say a few things about all this, even though the whole drama somehow passed me and never really caught my attention.

First of all, yes, I know how hard and depressing it is to lose your job and how those 'little' things can help you cheering up again.
The old saying, that those who want to work will find work simply doesn't count anymore those days - especially since required qualifications increase even for the shittiest jobs. Hell, I'm waiting for people need to go to university for getting a janitor-job - oh, right, it's 'facility manager' now ^^

Besides, seeing how long most artists take, I assume many commissions were already ordered and paid long before the whole thing started.

Banning someone because of rumors and what others say or claim is medieval methods - but it seems they are still present in some people's heads. Anyways, those shouldn't be set into positions with administrative responsibility.

And about the whole donation-stuff, that's a thing that simply sickens me. Why? Because as soon as someone has gathered a bit of popularity, people would practically buy or give them ANYTHING.
If you have fans, you only need to post a journal like ".. and I have to remember to extend my premium membership at thisandthatwebservice" and boing, someone pays for it!
It has become some weird, sick meme on FA and even here that people beg for donations rather than get their asses up and straighten out their finances.
Funny about the whole thing is, people other than you begging for money also post new commissions two weeks later and NOBODY ever asks questions about where their donations went.

People whine about being flat broke and about to be kicked out onto the streets - and surprisingly still have their PC/Notebook, Smartphone, Tablet ..
Seriously, people, after you have sold all your thousands-of-dollars-gadgets, THEN you can beg for money. Everything else is NOTHING but personal management and if you earn one grand a month, you can't just spend it all on arts and gadgets and THEN start whining around if there's no money left to fix your car.
And the furry community is NOT there to fund YOUR studies.
If you can't afford it - welcome to the big global mass of others that can't.

Grrmpf.

If there's ANYTHING really worth changing about sites' TOS, it would be prohibiting people asking for private donations.
LupineAssassin
7 years, 2 months ago
First of all, thank you for commenting here. I've made a solemn vow NEVER to ask for handouts again. I've kept that promise since getting banned, and I won't break that promise, no matter how much I hurt. Everyone who helped me out got their money back. Every. Single. One.

Secondly, I won't ramble about "the hypocrisy", but I see how bad it's become and it's only getting worse.

Thirdly, I'm glad to have you as one of my legion of furry people I can call friends. ^^ THANK YOU! :)
virazvitalia
7 years, 1 month ago
I honestly don't see the reason why your personal situation was out in the open like in fact its kinda messed up to put all your bsuness out there like that honestly i think the whole thing should have been kept between the people in the problem but some furries just don't know how to keep their mouths shut. but hope everything gets better for you.
LupineAssassin
7 years, 1 month ago
*HUGS* Thank you. ^^ :)
virazvitalia
7 years, 1 month ago
you're welcome i mean i have no right to pass judgement or any of that petty crap cause i don't know you then ieven if i did if i ain't part of the problem i would keep my mouth shut until asked my opinion but so far you seem like an okay guy and all that good stuff
LupineAssassin
7 years, 1 month ago
Oo, thank you. ^^ I get along with everyone. :)
virazvitalia
7 years, 1 month ago
thats good to know hopefully we will get the chance to talk more extensively
RallyReki
7 years, 1 month ago
your personal life is just that, your personal life. No one had a right to say anything bad or spread rumors. No one should ever do that.
I'm sorry for all thats happened, I really am. Life sucks, its just best to enjoy the little things.
*hugs* if I get more chances, I'll see about drawing something if you would like.
LupineAssassin
7 years, 1 month ago
Thanks so much! ^^
lionorking
7 years, 1 month ago
HUGS!
LupineAssassin
7 years, 1 month ago
*HUGS THE LION*
meaux
7 years, 1 month ago
I don't know you too well, but I've been watching quietly from the side lines. WTF, is all I can say, yet I see this all the time, in various fandoms around the world. Best thing is to go around those people and stick with your true friends. They'll steer you true. False friends will own out their deception with time.
LupineAssassin
7 years, 1 month ago
Thanks, Meaux. :)
UTXShapeShifter
7 years, 1 month ago
:3 hey Dude I wouldnt Hate people for most of any reasons. (Even if they art theft me or trolled me XD) If I block someone Its not permanent :3 its more like a Time out.. But anyways you havent done anything wrong to me so you have a clean slate on me. ^w^ Pretty much I consider you a pal. I wonder when we can chat tho hehe.
LupineAssassin
7 years, 1 month ago
*HUGS* Good to see you again!! I'm open anytime for a chat. Which instant messengers do you use? :)
UTXShapeShifter
7 years, 1 month ago
I like to use Msn XD :3 It Pretty much Keeps all my contacts in one place. :3 hehe *Licks* Plus less stressing for me Considerin that I like to try to have Different website art accounts heh
LupineAssassin
7 years, 1 month ago
Sending you a PM here. ^^ Thanks.
SpaceCat
5 years, 8 months ago
Real friends will follow you to better sites. Getting banned from FA isn't stopping you from stating your case, which you just did. With how unfriendly FA has gotten, why go back. Just sayin'  
LupineAssassin
5 years, 6 months ago
*hugs* Thank you. :)
SpaceCat
5 years, 6 months ago
*huggles* ^.^
HRaiden
5 years, 6 months ago
*gives you a warm, fuzzy, superhug*
LupineAssassin
5 years, 6 months ago
*wuffie hugs* ^^
DogBoneArtWork
5 years, 2 months ago
sooo does she still live in AZ?
LupineAssassin
5 years, 2 months ago
Unless I'm mistaken, she currently lives in Washington state.
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