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LupineAssassin

Virtual hug, anyone?

I'm still debating whether or not to see a psychologist or psychiatrist. I still have a lot of unresolved emotional baggage, and there are days where I feel close to losing what resolve I have to stay afloat.

I assume it's all part-and-parcel of the human condition, and a learning experience. I've been through enough mental anguish over the years; no need for me to explain why.

Thank goodness I have tons of furs to chat with. That always helps. Even though I find comfort talking things out in the furry community, at the end of the day I cannot shake the feeling of crippling loneliness.

I need to keep reminding myself not to dwell on it too much, or I'll go mad. Maybe it's the late hour, idk. Anyway those are my thoughts for the evening. Comment as you see fit. Thank you.
Viewed: 110 times
Added: 7 years, 1 month ago
 
MarcoWolf
7 years, 1 month ago
you poor thing i think you just need a hug and a night out at a bar with as many close friends as you can find who will buy you drinks all night.
LupineAssassin
7 years, 1 month ago
*HUGS* Thanks.
MarcoWolf
7 years, 1 month ago
im here to talk if ya need me. *HUGS*
KannetKitsune
7 years, 1 month ago
*glomp huggggies*
LupineAssassin
7 years, 1 month ago
KannetKitsune
7 years, 1 month ago
*nuzzles your neck and holds you tight*
DorkyWolf
7 years, 1 month ago
*hugs* Stress from daily life and passed events is a tough thing to deal with, but it is one challenge that, once overcomed, will leave you at peace with yourself! ^_^ Take it from someone with experiece! I have a memory hoarding OCD. All traumatic events in my life are stored in my head, and I can't let them go, ever! >< But, with friends to talk to and support me, and the promise of a bright future ahead, I always pull through, because I know that although I can't change what has happened to me, I can certainly influence what will later on! And that keeps me going! <3

I hope you start to feel better! Possitive outlook on all things is a great place to start! Look at all the bad, and see it as a lesson that can lead you to the good! After all, what does not kill you only makes you stronger! Use the knowledge from past mistakes and events to lift you up, and make you a better furson! <3

And try not to take any mishaps to heart! Everyone makes mistakes, and not one person is perfect at anything! And, good luck my friend! *hugs again*
LupineAssassin
7 years, 1 month ago
Thank you so much. ^^
DorkyWolf
7 years, 1 month ago
You're very welcome ^_^
viviboi9
7 years, 1 month ago
Awwwww *hugs u* I never knew I'll be your friend till the end ^-^
LupineAssassin
7 years, 1 month ago
*hugs* Thank you, Vivi. :)
viviboi9
7 years, 1 month ago
Your welcome no one should feel sad *smiles*
CosmicMutt
7 years, 1 month ago
*hugs* man I have an idea of what your going through a few years my mom had a nervous breakdown and she was put in the hospital for a while from things that were happening at the time. She saw a psychiatrist and it helped her some but I think she just wanted to fight this fight on her own and she made it through and shes alot better now. This may have nothing to do with your talking about but its late and I'm not thinking as much as I normally do. you aren't alone you have friends and furs who you can count on to be there when you relieve some pent up stress in a journal. Imma shut up now. ^__^
LupineAssassin
7 years, 1 month ago
TY, Cosmic. :) I did feel a bit better after posting this journal, yes.
CosmicMutt
7 years, 1 month ago
Welcome, I think its always good to vent when the stress gets bad enough. An don't I get a hug?
LupineAssassin
7 years, 1 month ago
*HUGS* Yes. :)
CosmicMutt
7 years, 1 month ago
Huzzah! Now I can slumber in peace.
Tycloud
7 years, 1 month ago
But you never talk to me!
LupineAssassin
7 years, 1 month ago
*hugs you*
biohazard
7 years, 1 month ago
*hug* <3
LupineAssassin
7 years, 1 month ago
Thanks. *hugs you in return* ^^
dmfalk
7 years, 1 month ago
LupineAssassin
7 years, 1 month ago
Thanks so much. :)
dmfalk
7 years, 1 month ago
Thought you'd appreciate seeing Central Park in a whole new (infrared) light, since I've been hung up on infrared photography & videography, lately... ;)

d.m.f.
IrritatedCharizard
7 years, 1 month ago
*reachs through cyber space and hugs you at your pc* ^.=.^
LupineAssassin
7 years, 1 month ago
Heh! *hugs you* :)
Thanatos
7 years, 1 month ago
I think you need a stiff drink and a stiff dick. Luckily I happen to have both! *licks your nose*
LupineAssassin
7 years, 1 month ago
^^ *hug*
ShanetheFreestyler
7 years, 1 month ago
I'll always hug anyone who needs it. *Huggles*

And if you wanna say something to me, feel free to.
LupineAssassin
7 years, 1 month ago
Thank you. *hugs*
ShanetheFreestyler
7 years, 1 month ago
No prob. ^-^
lionorking
7 years, 1 month ago
MSSIVE HYPER LIGER MACRO MEGA HUGS!
LupineAssassin
7 years, 1 month ago
OO! :D *hugz* :P
lionorking
7 years, 1 month ago
hugs ya tight "hey you bee ndoing okay?
LupineAssassin
7 years, 1 month ago
I should be okay, yeah. ^^
DinHusky
7 years, 1 month ago
As you know, I've had a lot of crap go down with me awhile back. My counselor told me that "No one can shake the feeling of loneliness, even when they're surrounded by people." But I prove her wrong: Think back of a time when you felt like you were part of a big family, and no one judged you. Bringing memories back is a good thing humans don't really utilize to elevate their mood.  

Also, try writing stuff down. Either on the computer, or get a diary (OMG!). When no one is around to talk to, getting things out on paper, or out in general can help relieve a lot of stress. :3

*hugs super-duper tight* Besides, A little under 80 days till you meet me and Briggs at FurFright! ^^ You won't be lonely then.

~HazardPup
LupineAssassin
7 years, 1 month ago
*hugz* Thanks so much. Cannot WAIT to meet you guys! :D
nekkofox
7 years, 1 month ago
*Gives you super hugs*

I try and look at it this way. If you think seeing psychologist or psychiatrist will help ease the pain, even slightly, then it's worth it (granted, that is if you can afford them).

If not, be it price or dissatisfaction, all I can say is buck up, life has a way of evening things out eventually and you have good times ahead.

Oh, and don't let bastards get you down. Remember! They will eventually die.
LupineAssassin
7 years, 1 month ago
*giggles and hugs* Thank you. :)
PorkbellyMon
7 years, 1 month ago
I feel lonely IRL because I wouldn't think I'd find people I relate to, now that I have furries, at least I can get a handful who know me well enough :3 To me, even if I only have one friend, that still counts as social life!
LupineAssassin
7 years, 1 month ago
Before I joined the fandom, I was very introverted and had no social life whatsoever. *hugs*
DictatorEuro
7 years, 1 month ago
-snugs-
LupineAssassin
7 years, 1 month ago
Aww *hugs* ^^ :)
Jimbear
7 years, 1 month ago
*hugs you tightly*  :-(  Allan, honey, I suggested to you before to see a psychologist.  (Psychiatrists prescribe pills to keep you calm, but they never talk about past events and emotional baggage.  It's best to get both, actually, but psychologist first.)

LupineAssassin
7 years, 1 month ago
*hugs* Already saw a psychologist once before, and got papers to prove it.
Jimbear
7 years, 1 month ago
Well go see a different one honey.  Each psychologist has his/her own unique style, and if you don't get along with one, then it's time to switch.

I went to a psychologist from 2009-2010, and when I vented about something, that bitch called ME abusive.  Then I got angry and stormed out of there, leaving my mother to deal with her (since my mother sometimes accompanies me, which I actually don't mind), and the psychologist said if I ever wanted to see her again that I'D be the one to apologise.  I said 'fuck that'.

So, long story short, find one that's right for you.
LupineAssassin
7 years, 1 month ago
HUGS!
scriber
7 years, 1 month ago
Going to see somebody can be a real boost. The worst that can happen is you don't mesh personality wise, in which case you move on to someone else. A lot of people get help through therapy, and if your quality of life can be improved - even if it's just regular ol' human condition type stuff, or more serious - sometimes folks need a hand with the stress. Sometimes that hand is an ear. A professional to help give you perspective, which is really important to have!
LupineAssassin
7 years, 1 month ago
Thanks, Scriber. :)
DOtter
7 years, 1 month ago
*hugs*

I don't need to tell you that a lot of people in your peer group (Furry) don't like you, so feeling cut off is pretty much understandable. OTOH, quite a few people (see above -- me too) have been and are still ready to give you a second chance; I've little doubt that you're grateful for that. (And I'm glad that I got to know you before I knew "who you are," which frankly makes me feel pretty stupid.) You probably were alone and unloved at one point, and that probably hurt you very deeply, but it's not true any more. You are liked, even loved.

If you're worried about your mental state, here's a self-directed web survey that might help.
http://checkupfromtheneckup.ca/
...I took the "check-up," (it told me I'm okay), it's actually kinda fun. Even though the resources it can direct you to are across the continent and in another country, if nothing else it can help you understand what might be happening to your mind. That alone can be reassuring, (especially if it tells you that you're just lonely.)

If you do need help, probably you can't afford it. All knowledge resides in The Internet, so maybe with some intelligent guesses and help from those who've been through it, you can work something out. I'll help if I can.
LupineAssassin
7 years, 1 month ago
*BIG HUG* :) Thank you.
DOtter
7 years, 1 month ago
You're welcome.
meaux
7 years, 1 month ago
-hugs- Here to listen if you ever need it. As for which psych, I'd start with a Psychologist. They can't prescribe drugs, so they'll try and help you without to keep your business. Then you go see the psychiatrist.
NickLion
7 years, 1 month ago
*Hugs* Therapy can always help - as someone with general anxiety disorder and panic attacks, I know what it's like to be alone and start freaking out randomly! You can get through it, just be aware of when you're having automatic-negative-thoughts, and use logic to help talk yourself down.
RandyTheFox
7 years, 1 month ago
*big huggg* Yey~! -^.^-

I know what you mean. I have been looking for a boyfriend for a long long time... that is for all of my life =P Unfortunately with no results. But, what I keep thinking is, maybe tomorrow I will find him? Maybe tomorrow everything will change and I will have somebody I can cuddle, laugh with, and sleep with? That thought is making me still going on. So, think that you still have much love to see and feel in your life and just keep going~! ^///^

Best,
Randy~
LupineAssassin
7 years, 1 month ago
Thank you. ^^ :)
RandyTheFox
7 years, 1 month ago
Oh and if ya really think going to psychologist or psychiatrist, then I would definitely choose the first option xD The second is too stuffed with straitjackets and other strange things xD
But I personally think that the guy who sits in the chair and helps you by taking a lot of your money is also not a good way. The best way is just to be with people and have fun with them. Then you feel you can keep going on =D

<3
LupineAssassin
7 years, 1 month ago
It was late last night when I wrote this journal. Maybe I was rambling too much here.
RandyTheFox
7 years, 1 month ago
Nah nah, rambling is good! It shows that your mind needs something. Or somebody. Or just a hug~! *hugs*

=D
dmfalk
7 years, 1 month ago
I'll just add that many community/Open Door clinics (as well as VA clinics/hospitals- Your mileage may vary, though, with them) have on-site therapists & counselors, which would be a more affordable way to go. As with everything, some are good, some not- I was lucky to have a good counselor at my local Open Door clinic. though I wished she hadn't retired! It's hard for me to open up to someone, especially concerning certain things. I'm not sure how it's handled in NYC, but here in California, a limited number of visits is covered annually under MediCal/Medicare, but regardless, this is definitely an affordable option. Talking with a psychiatric counselor really, really does help. (And I've been there, if you know what I mean-- Depression is hell.)

d.m.f.
LupineAssassin
7 years, 1 month ago
Oh, I can relate! ;-) Thank God I get Army benefits forever. Getting to the VA hospital from where I am can be a real bitch sometimes cos of the distance. I'm still very angry they refused to extract some of my teeth; they said I don't need them pulled. It's MY mouth, not theirs! Jeez Louise! :P

Anyway, one day I may schedule an appointment with a specialist there and maybe talk things out with them.
dmfalk
7 years, 1 month ago
Sounds like you got a plan- Good! :)

d.m.f.
thevoreman
7 years, 1 month ago
Hugs you and does not let go!!
:)
Feel better, ok?
LupineAssassin
7 years, 1 month ago
*hugs* Thank you. :)
thevoreman
7 years, 1 month ago
*hugs tighter*
Your welcome!!
DexMason
7 years, 1 month ago
From me, you shall recieve one of my largest hugs!

*LARGEST OF HUGS*

And there you go. Don't let them get you down, LA!
LupineAssassin
7 years, 1 month ago
*HUGS YOU* Thanks so much. ^^
WolfGuy100
7 years, 1 month ago
Dude, if you do need to talk, I'm always on AIM and MSN, so, you know where to find me. :3 *hugs*
LupineAssassin
7 years, 1 month ago
*hugs* Thanks so much, Kyle. :)
WolfGuy100
7 years, 1 month ago
You welcome. ^^
DaniiPachiiBlackfire
7 years, 1 month ago
ohhh....*whimpers* i totes hug you *flattens ears, and hugs you*
LupineAssassin
7 years, 1 month ago
Awww *hugs you too*. :)
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